winter pictures

A few pictures...better than words.

Someone had her sleepypants on on Christmas morning.

Shan before the Rocket City Marathon in Huntsville. The excitement is palpable.


A short while later. Hot soup and a space blanket on a cold, windy day. Yum.



Speaking of post race chow, how about a little something after the Richmond half.

One of the coolest things about snow? The way it melts. Singletrack here on the farm is almost thawed out after 23" last week.

Crossroads

I have a friend who is going through this stage that all introspective women seem to go through in their mid-20's.  The stage where you finally allow the reality of getting through school and out on your own sink in and realize that nothing you have done to this point has really prepared you for the self criticism and unanswered future that lies before you.  These five years, or maybe more, are filled with the biggest personal questions you'll face - where you'll go, what you'll do there, who you'll love, and leave, along the way.  At this point, the blank slate concept is as intimidating as it is exciting.

I have another friend who once referred to this stage as a "quarter life crises".  I know everyone going through the "mid life crises" probably thinks that this is preposterous.  You're in your 20's, how can life be so difficult?  And, yes, I'll definitely grant that those days spent trying to figure out what you want to do with your life can be much much more exciting than a life spent living out the choices you've made, especially if they're the wrong ones.  And I think somewhere in there, within an books worth of questions, lies the pressure.

What if you get it wrong?

The choices you make daily are small enough to be laughed off or fixed if necessary.  The choices you make at that point in life:  location, careers, spouses, children.  These are the building blocks for what you'll wake up to, or walk away from, every day for the rest of your life.  I'm just saying I don't envy her.  I was there a few years ago too and when she stresses about whether or not to call him back or take that new position at her job, all I can do is tell her it will all work itself out and to just try not to worry.

There are parts of that identity that I miss just a little though.  I always loved wondering what the future was holding for me and how it would reveal itself and when.  I also miss some of the friendships I have that are changing due to us all "growing up".  I think about all that for a second and still don't want to change a thing.  Maybe that's how you know you've gotten it right, at least for now.

What she's going through in her life will eventually lead to what I kind of feel like I'm going through right now in my late 20's.  There's still a feeling of excitement, of course, because we still have so much ahead of us and so many new things to experience together.  There's the feeling of comfort with a hint of creeping, dying to break through self acceptance.  But there is a feeling of moving on, growing up (not old), and saying good-bye to that part of your life.  The part that would stay out too late, move across the country on a whim, and quit her job if she wasn't happy.  Your definition of 'fun' changes from not remembering a friday night to getting to bed early for that run you've helped organize in the morning.  Toddlers start to show up at the picnics you're attending.  And some of those questions you were asking yourself are finally answered.

I wouldn't change anything about my life now.  I'm fortunate enough to say that at the ripe old age of 28, I feel like I have everything I've ever wanted and I'm the happiest I've ever been.  But that doesn't mean I can't acknowledge that every so often I miss those times when not a whole lot made sense and that was ok.  In the end, we're all pretty fortunate, aren't we?  That we can spend an evening warm, with loved ones, watching our choice tv shows, and knowing that we have a place to go in the morning to provide for ourselves?

One of my favorite quotes is "You only live once.  But if you do it right, once is enough."

I wonder if that's true.

On a less "thinky" note, here's to presents of singing holiday clocks that shut off at night but wake you up at 6am.  See, MOST people would consider 6am night time.  Not our favorite little howling santa bears.

Every hour on the hour.    

Dave "shopping" for presents.

Happy Howidays.  Throw my ball.

Thankful

I always have a hard time coming up with things to be thankful for on turkey day, other than pie and Dave's mashed potatoes.  Definitely not because I'm not thankful for anything but more so that I feel like I try really hard to be that way all the time.  Really, I guess I'm thankful for having so much to be thankful for.  Awwww.  Ok, I know... "sure, whatever, just list it".  Fine.  I will.  So there.

More general things in life:
- My amazing, supportive, sweet, funny, sexy, caring, wonderful husband.
- My ridiculous bears.
- My family who made me who I am today.
- My friends for accepting me that way.
- Our simple existence and the ability to be healthy, work, fulfill our dreams, and take care of each other which, really, isn't that hard at all.

More random, specific things:
- socks, leaves, candles, hugs, cream soda, rain, peanut butter, feel good movies, flannel, naps, football, beer, sports bras, tupperware, shutter buttons, etc.
- And today, especially, because we hosted turkey day dinner for the first time, dishwashers.  I'm forever thankful for dishwashers.

Super short list for a really awesome world of things that I love but I'm getting tired and I'm still stupid full from dinner so that's all I got.  Well, here's to catching you all up a little:

Walks

Turkey Trot

Helping out at the kids race

I think I'm being watched (that's dave).

Finish line



Turkey Day

Shopping craziness

Oh yeah, and the dogs destroyed another one of their beds.  Look how innocent they're trying to be.  "Wasn't me, no sir.  No, I don't know who else was out here locked on the deck with teeth and claws that could have done this.  But it wasn't me.  Must have been the cat."

We don't have a cat.

Technology

I just figured out what a Bluetooth was.  Well, I still don't really know what it is or why they would call it a bluetooth but I do know that it is a way for my pictures and videos on my phone to get transferred to my computer.  Kinda scary actually.  I just sit here and press one button on my phone over here and it suddenly appears on my computer over there.  They've never been plugged in together, to me they're completely different devices.  But now they're talking.  Or toothing I suppose.  If there had been any other part or cord or button I would have had to pay attention to, none of this would be taking place, I assure you.  But, turns out, toothing is pretty easy.  And hopefully it's free.

That being said, here's a completely random collection of pictures from my phone.  Lucky you.  :)

From the 18 hours on the farm race...

A pile o bikes.

Our team, Bike Factory Racing.  And our mascot, the spaceman.

And my legs after the race.  No, that's not a tan line, that's mud.  Well, probably a bit of both.

These are from the beach, huge thanks to Becky and Larry for putting us up!!

Here are our two new nephews...

Baby Cody

Puppy Andy the panster

And this is what happens when my team (THE WORLD CHAMPION STEELERS) plays Dave's team (denver) and we meet up with friends to watch.  Sorry, couldn't get the picture to flip.  Maybe bluetooth can do that too.  Either way, someone should teach him some manners.

And THIS is what I get to do every time the Steelers BEAT the broncos.

The bet was the winner gets to hang their team's jersey on a wall in our house.  More pictures to come on that later.

Drama

Some weird things going around the local folks here in Cville.  Maybe it's the change in weather, maybe the swine flu shots, maybe I'm just not so distracted with other things that I'm actually noticing but some people seem to have gone a bit crazy.

Today, my co-worker got fired and pretty much lost her mind between the "this isn't working out" meeting to her exit from the building.  Locks were changed, computers were hacked, major contacts were called, I suppose we're all hoping she doesn't return and create a new term like "going non-profit on everyone".  I always wondered how the postal workers felt about the fact that they have a whole word dedicated to their industry that clearly means going insane and killing people.  That must be a bit frustrating.

Then there's some family drama, but since you all are probably the only people reading this at this point, we'll let that one be.  :)  Not to worry, though, we're doing ok here at the rancho relaxo.

And, really the worst of all, there's some sort of smell coming from the sleeping dog next to me that is quite disturbing.  Whatever, we're leaving soon to go watch some horror movies with our favorite new baby in town... hi, sophia!  

That's really all I've got for now.  Had a few minutes, thought I'd sit here and type rather than continue cleaning the house.  

Oh yeah.  Then there's this hidden gem that has managed to stay unposted from the internet for faaarrrr too long...  you love me.  You know you do.

Different World

The 2nd annual Fall Classic 10k was this morning and earlier this week, our friend and the race director sent out an email to a few folks asking if anyone would be willing to put up a few out of town racers on Friday night before the event.  Sure, why not, I would hope someone would do the same for us and it's always cool to meet another runner.  When she called and said that we were the only people who had replied and that the out of towners were actually 5 Kenyan pro runners, I couldn't wait.  Made sure they were ok with the country and two dogs and got approval from Dave, who of course was all about it as well, and we were on for an international sleepover.

They made dinner.  Not sure what it was called but it was tasty, full of carbs, and definitely got me thinking that I would surely PR at the race having soaked up all of their fast food and energy.  Things we learned or noticed:

- not cool with dogs.  Apparently they only use dogs as guard animals in Kenya.  Weren't too thrilled when Bender started growling at them.

- Main languages in Kenya are Swahili and one of 41 local dialects though they learn English really early on and most of their high school classes are taught in english.  These guys didn't speak much and most of the conversation involved tons of hand gestures and awkward grins.  They were great about it though and hopefully didn't mind all of our questions!

- All four of them (their coach made the 5th) came from one of three elite running tribes and now live in NC to train and run professionally, sending home most of their race winnings.  

- Fairly shy and reserved.  Maybe because we were total strangers but I definitely noted a lack of eye contact from the two women.

- Washed their hands in the dirty water soaking the pots and pans.  Good lesson here that maybe we don't need to waste as much as we think we do.

- Really in to my Garmin watch, especially the women.  Wanted to learn about the settings and features.  I had to explain to them that the 8 minute pace from my race was perfectly fine when they started giggling.  I seriously almost gave it to them right then and there.  If it hadn't been a gift (thanks, hubs) I probably would have.  

I didn't PR but I had a great race and loved hanging out with them for the night and morning.  Crazy cool experience.  Despite a late departure, flat tire, soaking wet roads, and tons of leaves making the course risky for someone at my pace, let alone someone who seemed to elevate as they ran, they took 1 and 2 in the mens race and 2 and 3 in the womens.  He won with a 4:58 average.  Insanity.

Dinner, super fast and hydration style.

And, of course, some more fall pics.  Today was perhaps the peak of this season...

Ready-ish

I ran my favorite run today.  A perfect fall afternoon at just the right temperature and just the right time of day.  AND, I saw only three other runners and two cars.  If you're from this area, Ridge Road is one of those cat-out-of-the-bag running meccas that only the locals know about.  But, turns out, there are usually a ton of locals there.  And for good reason.  It has hills, gravel, scenery, quick flats, and is just challenging enough to keep it interesting but doable enough to keep you coming back.  It's that one run that you would do if you only had one run left.  Well, that's a bit dramatic, but it is great.  :)

Anyways, on a day like today, I usually try and keep my mind off serious things and just look around at how amazingly beautiful the area I live in can be.  This proved a problem not only because I'm one of those people who tends to trip over things standing still but also because I was in a serious running kinda mood.  I suppose thats what an awesome run like today can do, get you jazzed up for more running.

Most everyone else's season is winding down and mine is just heating up.  I'm getting to high mileage and that means for the next 7 1/2 weeks, it's buckle down time.

...  slight deviation here but JD on Scrubs just answered his door in a onesie.  There are only a few people who will know how much my husband is enjoying this right now ...

So back to training.  Buckle down time means not only never missing a run but hitting all my mileage and paces until race day.  It means going to bed early, eating right, core work, constant stretching, and doing neurotic things like running up and down your 200 foot driveway to get that last quarter of a mile.  Anyone who's spent as much time as it takes to train for a distance race right knows how all consuming the last few weeks can be.  

Why am I taking this one so seriously?  I'm trying for a certain time.  No, I'm not writing it here.  Because that would make it entirely too real and I reserve the right to stand at the start line and change my mind - I need that safety net, so sue me.  I've definitely gone out for times and pushed myself before but the difference with this one is that it might just be out of my reach.  And, I'm totally not trying to be arrogant here, but I've never not reached a goal I've set for myself.  Here's the thing though, the not being arrogant part, I've never really set a goal that I knew I couldn't achieve.  And this one, I'm not so sure about.  

I know, at the end of the day, I can always go out for that time again, no big deal.  But what that means is another year of base miles, speed work, repeats, and thinking ahead to one race.  One day.  __ hours and ___ minutes.  I'm ready for this to be over.  But I'm only ready if it works out in my favor.  Totally chicken, I know.

Don't you wish it was as simple as getting amped up to go for a walk or chase something outside?  Something like deeries? Do you?  Do you want to get those deeries?  Do you?!



 

wooden patio furniture

My new friend, Tobias, mentioned the other night over some beers that we should build our own wooden patio furniture.

"totally," I responded, "we should do that."

We should, after all. Patio furniture costs a mint these days, and Tobias has a bunch of old wood near his house that could use some structure and a deck to sit on. Sunny days and lemonade. etc.

But I didn't really think he was serious until the next day he called, "so when are we going to go look at that wood?"

Well, I'm in. No idea about patio furniture, but I'm learning about it. And wood...

In the meantime, Happy Hawoween.

Kerosene

I always think it's funny that in the fall, the thermometer dips under 70 and we crank up the heaters, unpack wool socks and snuggle under comforters but wait until spring and anything above 50 degrees, we're driving with the windows down and shivering in our t-shirts.  I suppose it's that ever present need for the next thing.  Another reason I love Virginia.  Pretty much 3 even months of all four seasons, right on schedule to give you enough time to enjoy the current weather but then changes things up right when you're getting tired of your current situation.

Oh, right, kerosene.  So, we heat our house pretty much entirely on a wood stove.  And my dad, having done the same throughout my childhood, has recently discovered this wonderful liquid.  Stack the wood in the stove, spray a bit (careful here), light, and you're set for a rager in a matter of minutes.  I only went through one full winter of making fires with newspaper and twigs - I can't imagine doing that again.  And, I won't have to.  Kerosene is glorious.

We also had a little family fun day at the Graves Mountain Lodge Fall Apple Festival (did that all need to be capitalized?).  I set out on my long run and dave loaded up the bears (that's what we call our dogs) and met me along the way.  Had a great country drive looking at the changing leaves and getting excited about some good hiking, apple picking, and bluegrass music... then we hit traffic.  Yeah, traffic.  In the country, on a Sunday, all for the festival.  I've been going to this event since I was a kid and I've never seen it this crowded.  I definitely understand that all things must progress at some point but I'll admit, I was pretty bummed that something like this couldn't just stay the same.  I suppose the secret is out.  And in the end, it's ok, it was a good one.  I'm sorta surprised they kept it for as long as they did.  Here are some pics...

  Portrait of the kids.  Bender (left) and Bailey.

Saturday

Saturdays in the fall - always a tough call between spending time outside doing...almost anything really...and watching college football. I used to be just a Pro Football guy, not really interested in amateurs who don't get paid $20Million/year to act like a spoiled jackass . But then I married Shannon, a college football aficionado, and I turned over a new leaf. It's amazing what your spouse can get you into. For example:

dogs





racing mountain bikes

bass fishing


OK, I'll be honest, Shan isn't really into bass fishing. Yet.

So, College Football. Today we're going to the UVA vs. Indiana game. We hope. All depends on getting tickets - so we're hoping for rain. One college football observation this morning...does Bobby Bowden look a lot like the evil emperor from Star Wars?

yes, luke, cut off his hand! Join the dark side.

Whatever, go 'hoos.

Mornings

Mornings just after the sun rises a bit (not too early, now) and evenings just before sunset are my two favorite times of day.  And fall is my favorite time of year.  And sunshine, with clear skies and comfy temperatures is my favorite type of day.  I can definitely appreciate all the others, rain, snow, cloudy, and actually look forward to them quite a lot, but this type of day is my favorite.  So, if you're in the Charlottesville area and are waking up this morning to the kind of day that today is turning out to be, you can imagine how thrilled I am.  It's gorgeous.  And I'm off work.  The leaves are changing, some already falling over the trails, and I'm making a motherly attempt to walk the dogs in the morning more often so they don't bother Dave (who works from home) as much by whining and wanting to play until he has time to take them out.  This trend proves obviously to be a lot easier on a day like today when it's beautiful and I'm off work so I don't have to get up any earlier than usual.  We'll see how it sticks once back in the drone of regular daily life.

Anyways, our oldest, Bailey, doesn't really stick around for the walks so don't look forward to seeing many pictures of her here.  She gets let out and proceeds to make her own adventure, chasing squirrelies or deeries or anything she can find.  She'll check in every so often and then just meet us back at the house when she's ready to come home.  She's our adventurer, never ready to walk the normal path until she's doing it in her own time and on her own terms.  Just like her mama.  :)

Bender is the exact opposite.  He just wants to be loved and for someone, anyone, to throw his ball.

For those of you who are wondering, this will be the view from our back porch once the county gets around to deciding that we're actually allowed to build on land that we own.  No sarcasm here.  None at all.  But here's the view...

I know, we're ridiculously spoiled and lucky.

Lastly, Dave has been working tons at getting everything ready for the Paranormal race next weekend out here on the Teventrails.  I'm fairly sure no one is actually reading this blog yet but if you are, happen to not have anything planned for the 17th, and want to come out, here's the link...

http://www.bikereg.com/events/ConfList.asp?EventID=9041

And here's just a bit of what you'll be riding...

And here's me.  Just because.

Cesanatico, Italy, March 2009

To have a blog, I want to dispell the notion that this has all been done before. It has, of course. But that's really what you do when you set out down the same path that everyone else has taken - you try to identify it as your own. Walk a little slower. Take a few more pictures. Put them on a blog, perhaps.

All those footprints in the sand aren't ours, but when we look behind us after having a blog for a few years, I'd like to think the prints we see will be our own, and the journeys we'll have taken will be joyful ones.

Here's to trying to keep our fingers off the camera lens.

I wonder why we're doing this...

Hi there.

This being our first post, I'd like to discuss the title for a second.  For me, out and back has two meanings.

One, it is a route, a way of organizing a run or a ride that starts and finishes at the same place, following the same route twice, once out and once back.  This really makes sense for Dave and I because we're both very active and often find ourselves on these sort of adventures.  I actually don't like out and backs because they're fairly boring, something I'm learning about myself, my need to changes things up.  But, I do like the idea of noticing new things one way that maybe you didn't while going the other.  That's a great rule of life, isn't it?  Look at the same thing from two different angles and you're bound to see a new perspective.

Two, it's sort of how we met.  We had both left what we consider home for a number of years and ran into each other while back visiting, both for different reasons.  Mine, actually, would be considered more of a loop but we look at it as our ultimate physical and emotional out and back.  While on a search to find ourselves and perhaps each other, we only could once returning home again.

Moving on... having a blog with just yourself and your husband seems very arrogant to me.  It's often the same battle I have with hanging my own pictures, artistic or portrait, on our walls at home.  In a way, it's assuming that what you have to say or show is good or important enough to share with others.  Or maybe more important since you're pasting it all over the internet.

All that being said, I've been following a few blogs for a while now and I notice that it seems to fulfill various needs for everyone, the people writing them and the people reading them.  Here's a list of what I hope to accomplish with this blog of our family:

1)  Share what we're doing, feeling, thinking, and seeing with our family and friends who we don't get to see very often.  I've learned this best through my sister-in-law's blog in the wonderful way she posts pictures of my niece and nephews and writes about being a mom.  I actually feel as though I'm watching them grow up through her posts and am not so shocked when I finally see them in person and they're two feet taller than before.

2)  Chronicle my husband and I's life together.  We're not the photo album type of folks and the pictures on our walls rarely depict the stories of the days they show as well as we might with words.  I'm excited to hear his thoughts, share my own, and use this as somewhat of a digital photo album if we can and the internet doesn't crash anytime soon.

3)  Organize my own thoughts.  I used to write quite a bit.  I also used to take pictures almost every day. As we move through the years, those outlets seem to taking a back burner to just jotting down questions and quick ideas or thoughts in a notebook but never revisiting them.  I hope this will allow me to share what I think about and maybe, perhaps, even reach some conclusions on a few things even if it is just for myself.

What I worry about (this is another thing I'm discovering about myself - turns out, I can be a bit of a worrier.  Ok, fine, I cross the line into neurotic at times) is that it will become yet another bullet point on our forever growing list of things to do.  I worry that I'll stress about it more than just enjoying it as I find myself doing with so many other things.

It may end up being a journal of sorts, it may be more dramatic or more funny, it may be that this will be our only post and we'll decide, like that family google calendar we tried out for a month, that we just don't have time for anything else.  Whatever this turns out to be, I hope it's honest.  And I hope it fills some needs of ours, or yours, that we haven't yet acknowledged.